I have a great guy I am dating and he wants to get engaged and even though I know I want that I just don't feel ready for commitment and family. I did have the feelings of wanting to commit with my old boyfriend but he ended things a year ago because he cheated on me. I recently called him and now I feel really torn. He knows about my new guy and suggested maybe we need to see if we are still as compatible as before, we always had great sex. I do love my new guy but not enough to commit. Is there any simple way to figure this out?
It sounds to me like you are running an opinion poll to validate what you already know in your heart. I believe you answered your question in the second statement. You want relationship and marriage and kids but not with HIM. Your chronological age may be immaterial to this response but I hear a grass-is-greener-on-the-other-side comment.
And re: Mr. Before - has he decided he too wants to be with you in the way you know you want? Or is he looking for easy sex-with-the-ex as you were the one who contacted him? Do you feel you can trust Mr. Before? There is a reason for the idiom Leopards don't change their spots. However should you wish to run an opinion poll do so with two or three VERY good friends who have no vested interest in the results other than your happiness. Ask them what they see when they see the two of you together? If you are considering a major commitment then ask yourself two questions.
1) Can I see myself with this man 5 years down the road?
2) Am I proud to introduce this man to my friends?
Your love is a very special gift so be sure you give it to one who is worthy of it.